Tina Kakadelis
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Burn Before Reading: A Carly Allen Story

Gay Scooby Gang to the Rescue! (Supergirl 3.05 Recap)

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If you've read this blog before, you'll know that Lena Luthor is the sunshine angel of my life and SHE DIDN'T DESERVE THIS WHOLE ENTIRE EPISODE. The episode starts with Kara and Alex taking care of a bus full of convicts, I guess? I don't know. Anyway, they save the day and Kara asks if Alex is okay, and she ain't. Tomorrow is apparently a big day.

Everyone's favorite future world-killer, Sam, drops her daughter, Ruby, off at school and assures Ruby that the screaming she heard in the bathroom was totally normal and not at all caused by a hallucination from Krypton. Ruby doesn't believe her, but goes to class where this boy's like hey plz help me with my math homework, but then starts having a seizure.

Lena, Kara, and James are at CatCo when they see Morgan Edge on TV speaking from Lena's children's hospital. Edge is like a business guy and he hates Lena, but who doesn't on this damn show. Apparently, the lead bomb Lena rigged last season to save Earth from the Daxamites and banish Kara's shitty boyfriend is giving children lead poisoning. Yay! Another reason for everyone to irrationally hate Lena even though she's been proving her worth since day one!

This is also the long-awaited episode where the Maggie/Alex relationship effectively dies and I was NOT expecting their relationship to fully implode in the first five minutes, but here we are.

Alex, rightfully, is like we can't keep going around like this, point blank are you ever going to want to have kids. Maggie's like, I want you. And this is where I have some problems.

I don't know if it's lazy writing or just on par with the whole never letting Maggie be a fully formed character thing, but this break-up scene feels anti-climactic after everything they went through. Thanks for the ratings and the good press, now BE GONE. Chyler Leigh, though, as always, delivers, and I wish the Emmys would notice. Of all the things this show drops the ball on, it's Chyler Leigh who shines again and again through it all.

Gal Pals Kara and Lena go to the hospital and find Sam's there with the seizure boy. I'll go on the record saying that Lena Luthor storming up to a man and yelling at him is 100% my sexuality. Edge then talks about cobras and India and IDK. That all somehow adds up to destroying the tiny bit of goodwill Lena has by saying that he may be scum of the earth, but at least he didn't poison children.

We're only seven minutes in and this is my current mood because I just want Lena to be happy for ONE DAY: 

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Me, tired of people's shit in regard to Lena Luthor

So the Best Friends Squad of Kara and Sam is trying to prevent Lena from spiraling because of this, but joke's on them because Lena's thought her whole life that becoming a "Luthor" is inevitable. This just seems like par for the course. James comes in and says that maybe Lena should step down from CatCo so they seem fair and impartial, but Kara's like that's an admission of guilt. It's nice to know Kara is literally always so ride or die for her. Remember that scene last year when Kara was so MAD no one trusted Lena that she had to go punch some concrete? Remember how gay that was??

Lena's like I'm gonna step down from L Corp because helping people has to be the focus. An angry dude comes in and says where's Lena Luthor, she's gotta answer for my son. He yells at her saying his kid should be outside laughing and playing, not with a tube down his throat because he stopped breathing. Obviously Lena's heartbroken, she tries to apologize, and the dude isn't having it.

Lena sets a press conference for the afternoon where she's greeted with chants of "Lock her up!" I know the writers love their damn Trump allusions, but when they let a slave-owning, misogynistic white boy steal the show, I feel like they kinda lost that right for a while.

I'm gonna be honest, her speech is real sad. She says how much of a conscious effort she's put into separating herself from her family and just being a good person. Somebody's got a gun and starts firing. James tackles Lena to the ground and gets shot in the process. Maybe James finally believes Lena's a good person??? Only time will tell.

JK, we come back from the commercial and James is like, can't really blame the lady for shooting at Lena because she just found out her son took a turn for the worse and was going after the person responsible. Cue Kara about to go punch some more concrete:

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Same, Kara. Motherforking same.

Sam takes Lena in after the 100000000th attempt on her life. And this is finally the one that rattles her?? Lena's been shot out of a helicopter and fallen off a balcony before. But I guess being accused of killing kids is essentially forcing her into the monster she's always feared she'd become.

We're back to Maggie and Alex. Listen, they deserved better than to be the C plot of a three-episode arc. They're getting hammered packing all their stuff up and this might be my favorite scene of theirs. TOO BAD IT'S THE END. And too bad it was .0005 seconds long.

Um, I get that Kara and Lena are supposed to be just really good friends, but with every episode, and every time Lena stares longingly at Kara, it stops being true. This isn't to say that women can't have strong, intense friendships without coming off as gay, they certainly can. The Bold Type is focused on three best friends and never once did I think they were gay for each other because the characters aren't portrayed that way. There's nothing gayer than Kara and Lena and it's a damn shame The CW will never let it forking happen. It's more compelling than any other relationship this show has to offer.

Anyway, SOMEBODY JUST NEEDS TO GIVE LENA A HUG because her drunk spiraling about how poisoning children is something even Lex Luthor never did was just too much. Kara's like I would literally die for you, but Lena's like stop believing in me I'm not worth it. And I'm SAD.

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Me, watching Lena Luthor think she's not worthy of love.

Kara and Sam stay up late trying to clear Lena's name. They find out all the kids who were affected ate at a dumpling truck on the same day and they think that's a solid place to start.

Maggie and Alex are back and Maggie says are you sure you wanna give up this tangible real thing for some notion you have of being a mom, and first of all, that's rude. Uh, but catch me crying about Alex talking about how she's always wanted to be a mom.

Sam and Kara are at a local pool in the middle of the night in an effort to clear Lena's name because they're both Lena's number one fans. They find out that all the kids not only went to the dumpling truck, they also swam in the pool, which has a lotta lead in it. There's a stockpile of synthetic chemicals in the chlorine that the pool has been using, all supplied by Acre Lee Chemicals. They tell Lena and she pretends she doesn't know the company, but then she rolls up to Edge's office because he's the man behind the company.

Lena accuses him of OH SHIT SHE PULLS A GUN. I'm sorry, I got distracted. She tells him that the mom who shot at her was in the right because whoever poisoned these sick kids doesn't deserve to live. She doesn't get a chance to pull the trigger because someone knocks her out and she wakes up on a plane going who knows where.

Apparently, it's an Acre Lee plane full of a bunch of chemicals being flown remotely, so there's no pilot. Edge has a camera set up, so he sees her try to make a distress call. Edge's plan is to drop all the chemicals into the reservoir, effectively poisoning all of National City. However, lucky for Lena, the plane's flying over the DEO, and despite them only receiving two words of her distress call, Gal Pal Supergirl recognizes Lena's voice and promptly rips off her glasses to go save the day.

Despite Lena literally being about to die, she still fixes it so the chemicals can't be dropped into the water. Edge doesn't like that, so he starts to crash the plane. Supergirl shows up and tells Lena to strap in because she's got a plan. A plan that ultimately splits the plane in half. Holding both parts of the broken plane is somehow too much for her to handle, despite the fact that she lifted a submarine earlier this season. Anyway, in one hand she has the half with Lena, and in the other hand she's got the chemicals.

Lena tells Supergirl to take the chemicals and let her die, but Supergirl's like I will NOT drop you. And then there was this beautiful moment where Lena, who felt resigned to her fate as an evil Luthor and accepted that death was what she deserved, chose, once again, to fight for herself and her life. All because of Supergirl. Because if Supergirl and Kara Danvers believe in her, then she must be doing something right. Lena ends up climbing the side of the plane into Supergirl's loving arms. God save the gays.

Supergirl confronts Edge and he's like IDK man, this crazy angry ex-marine tried to kill Lena, not me. He then asks if Supergirl knows what it's like to be that angry and, bro, lemme tell you the three things Kara can get angry over:

  1. The Danvers Family
  2. Lena Luthor
  3. Potstickers

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

He's trying to provoke her into channeling that anger into killing him; what a fun, casual thing to do. But she doesn't do it because she's a hero and it's against her code or whatever.

Lena shows up at CatCo to talk to James. Listen, I like James from season one. I don't like his inability to trust Lena and I don't like the idea of them dating. It feels very much like the writers don't know what to do with him as the Editor-in-Chief of CatCo, and when they don't know what to do with a character, they just throw them into a relationship. See: Any relationship after season one.

Alex and Maggie are back again and lemme just say, I will always be thankful for Alex's coming out arc. It was one of the best ones on TV, but I am underwhelmed time and again by Alex and Maggie's actual relationship. Yet here I am, crying because Maggie's last words to Alex were "You're going to be a great mom."

So often, coming out stories are reserved for teens, but there are a lot of people who don't figure it out until later in life. I thought the writers did Alex's story magnificently. However, if they knew going into season two that Maggie's actor wasn't going to be in the show past the season two finale, they should have NEVER added the proposal.

Finally, Lena Luthor gets a hug like she DESERVES and is in awe that not one, but TWO people love her more than her own family. Kara gets a call from Alex, who's at a bar drinking since Maggie is officially gone from her life. Kara decides the two of them need a vacation because, let's be honest, THEY DO. They're going home.

In the last scene, Ruby mentions to Sam that there's a hole in Sam's shirt and she's like, that's weird. I guess for normal people, that IS weird, but it's pretty standard for me. Anyway, Sam kisses Ruby goodnight, then frantically rushes to the kitchen where her jacket is. Inside the jacket is a bullet from the assassination attempt on Lena. The bullet's crumpled and Sam has no bruise on her body, which means she's invincible? Maybe? Who's to say?

Guys, season three is good????

Me, in disbelief of this season